Day 2/365: today

Today I really wanted to be present. To focus on my kids and the sunshine and being present in the moment. And it was awesome. 

We played in the sunshine, kicked our soccer ball, threw the softball, played in the swings, went on a nature walk, ate Popsicles, met friends and had a great day. I doubt this day will stand out in my children's or even my memory, years from now. But it was one of those really wonderful and really simple days. 

We came home, had pizza and they were right back outside, together. Playing their own game on our trampoline. Now everyone is just about asleep and all I can think is how today was exactly the kind of day I want to have with them. 

Our park, happily covered with people and sunshine. 

Making things and teaching...well, myself

Today was an interesting one. 

We just came back from fall break and I forgot to finish all of my planning for when we returned. (I was also late with my meal planning yesterday...)

So today I mapped out this week and then the rest of the 2nd quarter! I then proceeded to write the pretests, reviews, chapter tests, semester exam study guide and the semester exam! Then, I went through my files from last year and figured out what I would be yang again today. I also managed to photocopy the project instructions for this quarter. Not to mention, I got TONS of grades put in the computer! Whew! 

Know what we call this? Progress!!!

So this afternoon I met a mommy friend for a play date. Mostly to hide from my laundry, but also for our kids to play. 

See? 

Wouldn't you want to hide from that?!?

 While at the park, we commiserated over small babies, getting back into working out and trying to lose baby weight. I got some great feedback and shared some of my ideas for the blog. I'm thinking of sharing my breastfeeding tips, writing a workbook/planner of things to do for yourself/kiddo kind of like a book of yearly checklists, and (maybe) sharing some of my more personal tips regarding being married for 14+ years. Some days are great and some days well, they just aren't. 

I have found though that approaching parenting like teaching really helps. One piece of this, I discussed last week when I said that I had gone to the bank and was told to start by setting small goals. Well, guess what? I had a list of to-do's and one of them has already paid off!!

So, don't try and do all your laundry at the same time. But maybe set a goal for a load a day? What great tips do you have for managing it all? 

The green eyed gal

I have I spent a decent amount of time today working in this blog post. Thinking about what message for parenting and/or teaching I wanted to share today. Because it's my fall break, that also meant I spent to much time on Facebook. I saw lots of beach and vacation pictures and sadly, I felt my eyes turn a little green. 

Then this afternoon, after taking Annie to go use her gift cards and buy things she didn't need, we had the following conversation. 

Her: I'm so tired of seeing vacation pictures. 

Me: well, if it makes you feel any better, I think most of the people I see are shivering. 

Her: (laughing) true 

Later...

Her: my friends went to the beach together and didn't invite me. 

Me: what would you have said if they did?

Her: I probably couldn't have gone, but I wouldn't be jealous because at least they would have asked. 

Several other omens occurred today that made me jealous of friends for the following reasons:

1. Perceived better credit, income, money management, savings, etc

2. Less kids 

3. More (perceived) free time

4. Personal recognition/achievements at work 

5. Reaching/pursuing personal goals

6. Hanging with mom/siblings

7. Bigger/better houses

None of these speak anything to whether or not I have a great life, kids, family, etc I have a great life, wonderful kids and an awesome family. 

But to be real and fair, this is part of being human. We think whatever is on the other side of the grass, is better than what is right in front of us. And there may be parts of that life that we might like for a minute or two, but ultimately, we would go back to our own lives. 

I feel terrible for new moms. They have it the worst in all of this, I think. We've got seasoned moms sharing what worked for them as thought get thje it is holy truth. Their own mother and/or mother-in-law, or more, sharing what worked for them as though it is holy truth. Then there's the physicians and sadly, Pinterest and the Internet. There's no way to navigate that and not come out feeling like you're doomed before you even start. 

Is there a way to never get jealous? Maybe not. But I think if we can find a way to encourage each other, choose our goals carefully and work towards them; we might start to feel better about all of it. And if you're a new mom or dad and you're reading this, please know whatever it is you do to care for your child, it's exactly right. Do what works best for you and your family and you should come out just fine. 

Sometimes normal is just normal

I've noticed a lot of friends on Facebook and in day-to-day life ponder if their child's behavior is normal. (Maybe because sometimes our threenager's behavior is so awful we want to believe it must be a possession, complete with a need for a Linda Blair level exorcism?!) We all want to make sure we're doing the right thing, but also that our kid is, as the docs might say, WNL (within normal limits). Even after 5 kids, I still struggle with making sure everyone is ok, doing the right thing, and within normal limits. 

The same is true for marriage and relationships. But things are also a little different. Children grow, they change. In some ways, so does your marriage. Who you and your significant other were when you set out on this journey has, most certainly, for better or worse, changed. 

For example, when my husband and I met 15 years ago, I was 19 and he was 25. Both of us had not graduated from college, we had no children, all of our parents were still alive, etc. etc. over the course of our relationship, we have both grown and aged as people separate of our relationship and within our relationship, but so has the relationship. We have friends we've made as a couple, friends we had before our relationship, whom we now share and experiences we share that have changed our relationship, for good and for not so good. 

Ultimately, what I'm getting at is that after 5 kids and 15 years of marriage, what I know to be normal is a bit wild and crazy, but it seems to be normal for everyone. Teenagers will talk back, test boundaries, speak more for themselves, slam doors, help with more chores, develop their independence, smell bad, among other things. Smaller people will need to be reminded of boundaries, safety and appropriate coloring surfaces, convinced that it's ok to go to bed first, not watch EVERY SINGLE CARTOON EVERY MADE IN INE SITTING, and that sometimes we have to keep our shoes on. Marriages will be stressful, wonderful, easy, hard, emotional journeys. 

All of this is what makes life worth living. It's a great beautiful world and though my husband and children sometimes (often) help me have more stress in my life than I would alone, they make each day richer. 

So, if you're life feels like your constantly being pulled and you feel like it's a struggle. Please, hang in and hold on. You're not alone. We all feel it. Let your wall down and ask for help, or go to bed with a book and a sink of dishes. It may not seem like it right now, but you're worth the extra 5 minutes. 

I promise, you're doing great and I'm proud of you. 

A mural in downtown Memphis, with the right message. 

Tuesday equals second monday?

I don't know about you, but the start of school for 3 of my children and teaching takes a lot out of a person. There are days that I feel like I'm really on the ball and on top of things, and then there are days that I feel mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted. Do you have those days?


Since losing my mom, I spend a lot of time feeling like something is missing in my life. And there is, it's my mom. That's not news. I don't know if that feeling is ever going to go away. Some people say that the pain of losing someone you love will not be as strong as time goes on, I'm not sure if that is true or not. While I can talk about my mom with friends, family, my students, even strangers, without getting all teared up, I don't miss her less. Maybe I'm more comfortable with the loss than when it first happened?

Right now, I'm having a hard time. Not only am I missing my mom and having some general morale issues with being a teacher, I'm actually and acutely jealous of my friends right now as a result of my life choices. Please do not think I am say I regret my children. That is not what I am saying. I am saying that I'm looking at my friends who have one or two children and I'm remembering the simpleness of that compared to where we are now and I'm missing the more simpler part of my life. I'm sad for my friends who are struggling to get pregnant. I truly do not understand why I can get pregnant so easily and they cannot. How is that fair? What is it about my family that makes it so that I lose so many people I love in such a short time, and have 5 children without much effort? Why do my friends get to watch their parents grow VERY old and I don't? Why do I get to have 5 kids and some of my friends can't have even one? How does that make sense? Some people say it's G-d's way, but that leaves me feeling lost. So, I'm not sure what the answer is and that frustrates me.

Some people read my blog or see me in person and think that I have it all together. Please believe me when I say, that I so don't. I work hard at a few things that are important to me and I make the required effort at the others. Organizing and planning are things that I enjoy doing. Checklists make me feel like I am in control of the situation I am in, even if I'm not. I do not have a clean house, but I have a clean classroom. My space is organized at school because it is more conducive to learning and a fast-paced environment. My home is slightly more chaotic because I do not have imminent domain. My kitchen, bathroom, laundry area, well, my whole house; is not immaculate, but my children are well fed, they have clean clothes, they are bathed and they are loved.

Is it perfect? No. 

Does it work for us? yes.

For now, let's celebrate each other's good things. I'm going to try to be grateful for my kids today. I'm going to try to look for a silver lining and work on cleaning my house this afternoon, since I carved out some time to do it. I'm going to share with a friend who isn't getting pregnant, how much I love her. Will I be able to fix it for either of us? Probably not, but I'm hoping a coffee and a hug will let her know I care about her. Hopefully, cleaning a room, with my checklist and hugging my friend will help us both.

Community Values

Today was a busy day. And it's not over yet!

It was the start of the fall swim season with a meet 30 minutes away. This pool is one I enjoy because they have a front "lawn" where my girls can run around while we wait for my oldest daughter's next event. It was rather chilly today, so we ended up moving inside the building. Still space to move, but not as much as we like to use. I got to have a great conversation with a mom friend who I have not been able to talk with in a while. Her kids swim on the same team as my daughter and I really appreciate her perspective on things. 

We came home for lunch, naps and getting ready to go to events #2 and #3. Event number 2 was the Homecoming Fall Festival and 5k at my high school. Each year this event gets better and better. More booths, more kids coming out, more teachers/administrators participating and (most importantly, I think) more alumni coming out! My swim team sold "This is Sparta" yard signs to raise money for going to state and lots of students and alumni friends came out and participated! (photos by the 3 year old!!)

Event number 3 was Annie running in the Zombie 5k. My cousin Greg is a runner and offered to help her train for the St. Jude Half Marathon in December. When she said she wanted to run in today's race, I knew I wouldn't be able to but she asked Greg and he seemed delighted to do it. They had a great time and she finished well! Beating her PR by 1mibute and smashing her goal time today by 5! 

A photo finish for sure!!

In the midst of all of this, we realized I forgot to buy Brauts for dinner tonite! So instead it was grilled cheeseBLTs and fries. Trust me when I say, they were amazing! 

It was great to sit around the table with my whole family and hear everyone talk about their experiences with everyone today. 

Tonite, I'm heading back to my school to serve my time as a dance chaperone. In hoping not to be there too late, but I'm excited for the dance to have returned! 

What's the point of all this? Community. 

We all want our kids to feel safe. We typically want them to ha e fun, make friends and enjoy life. But through it all we want them to grow in a community that is strong, diverse and encouraged and nurtured them to develop into their best self. Today's event have several different communities, but ones that I'm grateful to be a part of. Communities I'm proud to see my children be a part of. Today I watched my students play with my children and my students were all having a great time sharing great experiences. It may be one of the greatest gifts of being a teacher and a mom. I'm proud to support both of these communities. 

What are you proud of in your communities? How are you helping to nurture positive experiences for your kids? 

Project 1: Melted Crayons...Pinterest made me do it!

I have often wanted to try this project. I have seen dozens of similar pins about it and I thought it would be a fun and simple way to get started trying all these pins that I have.

This past saturday I wanted to start with something that I have seen over and over and that I thought would most likely be easier to do.

Broken crayons seem to be all over my house, which made this project seem to be a great way to get them out of here! Doesn't it seem that with kids we have broken crayons everywhere?!?

 First things first, find a pin that works...It's it always a bummer when they don't? Once I found one that works, I gathered my crayons, cupcake papers and a cupcake tin ( I actually got out 2 because I knew that I wanted to make several crayons.)

Obviously, before I could get started, I had to peel all the paper off of the crayons. This is definitely a great activity for kids, as this was INCREDIBLY time consuming for me.Next up, of course, put them in the oven and wait.

Once they go in, it is important that you turn them in the oven, if you would normally turn your cakes or casseroles. If your oven cooks evenly, then you don't have to worry about it. But don't forget they're in there!





When they come out they'll look like a mess. I mean this.









After you let them cool, you can pull the cups out of the cupcake tins and put the crayons on a plate. Give them at least a good hour or two to cool off before you put them in something else, like a baggie or rubbermaid, that way they cool off all the way and don't stick together.

Once I knew they had cooled off enough I gave them to Lissy to color.

All-in-all, the activity was a lot of fun! I really enjoyed getting to play mad-scientist and Lissy seemed to really enjoy having big crayons to color with!

Happy Pinning!

Trick-or-Treat!

Halloween for us was a little bittersweet this year. In years past, my mom has been a big part of our Halloween night, seeing the kids in costume, having dinner, or some other fun event. This was our first Halloween without her and it certainly resonated.

Since I had class, the plan was originally that Geoff would take the kids over to a friends house and they would all go trick-or-treat together as a big group. However, that challenge presented new challenges and ultimately didn't happen.

I was really excited to take the kids trick-or-treating since it was MelissaJane's first year to actually be able to walk up to a door and do the whole thing herself. (She's got so much personality and is so cute, how could anyone resist the idea of seeing her!?!?!?)

So, we drove over to my parents' house where there were of course, two GrandPumpkins! Took the requisite pictures and off we went!

She totally got the hang of it! She loved carrying her hot pink pumpkin bucket, required both Annie and myself to hold her hand and loved waving bye to everyone at their doors. I promise it was the most adorable thing anyone saw that nite!

Playin in the Pumpkin Patch

We have tried, and not succeded, in years past to take the kids to the Pumpkin Patch for fall pictures. This year, I committed to it. Not only did I make Lissy a new outfit for the Pumpkin Patch, but I also mastered her first 4" bow! I was so excited!!!

We met our friend Maisye at the Agricenter to take pictures of the babies. I got a few good shots of Annie and Jonas, and a few of the all of the kids together. I also managed to get a mommy and kids picture, which I was pretty excited about.

I love seeing the kids in the clothes that I have made for them. I think my mom probably felt the same way about seeing us in the dresses she made. I decided to put Dilly in my thanksgiving dress. (Which inspired me to want to figure out how to make the dress style my mom used to make; but that's another blog post and another story.)

We let Lissy walk around and explore the pumpkins and the gourds that we sitting around the Big Red Barn at the Agricenter. Lissy had a blast wandering around in her new outfit checking out all the pumpkins and gourds. She was shaking the gourds and trying to pick up the big pumpkins.Once Maisye arrived, the girls had such a great time playing in the pumpkins. There were statues of hogs and horse that the girls really liked, but they seemed a little confused by them. Someone had cut open a very large pumpkin and though the outside was orange, the inside was very white.

Overall, I think the little girls had a great time.

Here's a few pictures from the day.

My soccer player!

My sweet son LOVES to play sports. Right now we are in the midst of fall soccer. (I know it's been a while since I talked sports on here, but let me confess that I am so glad that my son does not play competitive soccer or basketball or baseball right now! Yeesh.
But, he had a game this past Saturday and finally got a win!!!

Yeah!

He looks so cute out on the field and I can tell he is really trying hard to learn the game and get better at what he is doing...

No game this weekend, but I am sure he will be out in the back yard working hard to get even better!

(Did I mention it's really hard to take pictures of your own child at a soccer game?)

Lillian is 4 months old!!

 Happy 4 month Birthday, Lillian!!!

Time flies when  you're having fun! Or at least, that's what people say.

My sweet little Dilly baby is now a whopping 4 months old! I can't believe how quickly we have gone from having a teeny tiny baby to now having a little baby with a personality.

She had her 4 month appointment the other day. She got her shots, we attempted to give her the Rotovirus vaccine. The new vaccine delivery method is to have the kids drink it. Well, for my drooly baby that is easier said than done. But we did our best!

She weighed in at 14 pounds and 8 ounces and is now 26 inches long! My little baby is growing into a BIG baby! In a more stressful world, we have decided to do a chromosome test. There are some things going on that our Doctor wants to check out and we need to make sure we are doing everything we can to keep her safe and happy.

Times like this I miss my mom even more. Some to tell her about how quickly my baby is growing up and how sad I am that she isn't here and some to tell her how scared, worried and concerned I am about my baby and the world of the unknown. No matter what I know that she is watching over my sweet little family and loving us.

It's been a month....

Somehow that seems pathetic to me...

Updates:

1. San Francisco Trip was AWESOME! I love visiting that city. I will have lots of pictures to post in a bit, but let's just sum it up to say there are some cities that are just wonderful to visit and San Fran is definitely one of them!

2. Kids are growing and doing well! We started baseball, soccer, softball and the long course swim season... Phew! I'm worn out just listing all of that! The first few soccer games have gone ok, Jonas still has a lot to learn about the game, but he's trying! First long course swim meet, Annie improved on her times, which is good. Baseball practice and softball practice started off rocky for Jonas and Annie, Geoff (of course) is doing fine with his softball team...go figure! :)

3. Homebirth: Well, due to some changes happening between my midwives and (finally) having the full understanding of the financial implications, we will not be having a homebirth afterall. I am so incredibly bummed... We will be delivering at St.Francis in Bartlett...I will fully expect my friends to make a total nusance of themselves! Flowers and those crazy door wreaths are all welcome! (The more the better!)

4. School: Geoff is set to graduate in DECEMBER !!!!! Yeah! Very excited about that!!! After I interview, I should be officially accepted to the EdD program in Instruction, Curriculum and Leadership for the fall!

5. Maternity pics round 2 will be taken this coming sunday :) so those will go on the blog once they're available...

6. Baby Shower!!! So excited that I have the most awesomest friends in the world and Jennifer is hosting the shower!!! Orignially, she and our good friend Amber were hosting together, but Amber's dad recently suffered a trauma and she is returning to California to be with him. I am sad that she's gone.

7. Home News: Well, Geoff has gotten ALL the stumps out of the beds where the giant bushes were...I'll post pics in a bit...and his dad is working on moving to Memphis! Big Changes! Can't wait to get on the garden!!! Next year should be interesting and the year after, hopefully, we'll have some decent crops.

Only 27 days of school left after today...not that I'm counting down or anything....

More later!
 

Lots of things happening around the house...

So, lately there have been lots of crazy things happening around our house! We're getting ready to get Jonas' dresser thrown out, since, well, it's trash.
Geoff has finished anhilating the bushes in the back that we intended to throw out and it looks like getting the supplies for our dog run won't be too expensive....
that is...as long as you don't count the $800+ we're gonna have to spend to get the mercury mountaineer fixed! YIKES!

Jonas will be going back to school tomorrow, thank goodness!

One of my friends is attempting to patiently wait the arrival of his son, due today! Needless to say, both he and his wife are having a hard time with these (hopefully) last few hours...

I finally broke down and paid retail (sh, don't tell!) for a maternity sweatshirt from Liz Lange at Target...it's pretty comfy.

This weekend was Annie's swim meet. (The one I made the corn dip for.) She did such a good job, it was AMAZING! She dropped time on every event and event dropped 23 seconds on the 200IM!!! (For those of you who are not swimmers or are not familiar with the swimming world; the 200 IM is where a swimmer swims 50 yards of each of the 4 strokes; Butterfly, Backstroke, Breaststroke, Freestyle.) This is a fun event for Annie because she usually picks up a lot of time during the breaststroke and it's always fun to watch! But this time was even cooler! The hardest to watch, and the most nerve-racking, was the 50 breast. This was a tough one for me because she really wants to make a SouthEastern cut. (This means she gets to go to Championship Swim Meet for our Swim Conference, ie a really big deal!)

In baby news, I went shopping for fabric to make a quilt and a baby play blanket. I was kinda grustrated that I couldn't get the fabric I really wanted, because it was gender fabric, but it's super cute. (Pictures to come soon...)

Hopefully, the kitchen can get started and finished quickly and I can get my embroidery machine and start working on cute baby things!

First attempt at bows!

So. I went to Michael's today and got some super cute ribbon for making bows....wishing I knew if this was a boy or girl baby!....but, I decided Annie would love some cute bows, too!

This is the first bow I attempted to make! I'm not totally in love with it, but Annie said she loves it! So, I guess its a half win...

I'm going to keep trying because I'm really enjoying making things! This only makes me want to get an embroidery machine more!!!!!

Babysteals!!!!!

So, I was wrong yesterday....yesterday's babysteal was not the Klean Kanteen....that was front the night before! (The babysteal changes at 9am and at 9pm) Yesterday's babysteal was a pack of gdiapers!!! Which I totally took as a sign! And of course I scooped one up!
But then last nite, I couldn't sleep....and for whatever reason, I still haven't figured it out, I don't get the email blast about the 9pm steal...Well, I couldn't sleep so I got on Babysteals and scooped up a super cute nursing cover. (Did I mention that we don't have anything for this baby?) This cover by Andee Lew, is one of the cutest things ever...and one I have totally drooled over on their site! Well, on babysteals last nite is was 50% of it's list price!!!! YEAH!!!

In other kid news...I'm getting ready to make corn salsa tonite, which I will post the recipe for and of course a picture! This is for part of the dinner for Friday nite's swim meet. Annie will be swimming in the Gabrielle Rose Classic, which is hosted by Memphis Tiger Swimming. She is super excited!!! Geoff and I are too, but since she's been really working hard on her times, she's probably a little more excited than we are...especially considering whenever there is a home meet....we have to work! LOL!

Today Jonas is going to the doctor to hopefully be cleared to go to school. He has been home for the past 2 days, and let me tell you, working with him on all of his homework is A TON of work! I don't know how they do it! I thought teaching High School was hard...but last nite, it seemed easier than what I did with my son!!! YIKES!

Here's the Corn Dip:

2 cans mexicorn (drained)
8 oz sour cream (I use fat free)
8 oz mayo (I use real)
12 oz shredded cheddar (I use real)
1 Tbs garlic POWDER (not salt)
1 Tbs Accent
~1 bunch scallions chopped (I use the greens also)
1 small jar chopped pimiento (and I chop finer)
Jalapenos to tasted (chopped fine)

I usually mix the mexicorn and cheese together in one bowl.  I then mix everything else together in a smaller bowl, which allows it all to mix together uniformly. I then add that into the mexicorn/cheese mixture and mix
together.

I make no less than one day ahead - it gives all the flavors time to blend. Anything more than 1 day, and I'd eat it all.

Enjoy and have fun.

Snow Day!

Yesterday was a wonderful, snowy gift! I got to stay home with my 2 and 4 legged babies! It was so fun to watch my dogs run in the snow and sniff and get surprised by the snow and then to watch my children play too!

Annie and I had a wonderful breakfast of bagels and hot tea, while watching the snow glisten. Later, she and I went outside, I took pictures and she played in the snow.

Jonas wasn't feeling well so he spent the day snuggled in the warm blankets. We let him go out for a little while and wouldn't you know it, when Annie and Jonas came in, they both went to sleep...it was so peaceful with everyone, dogs included, sleeping around me!

Geoff had a little too much fun though. He threw several, well packed snow balls at our living room windows....unfortunately, a couple landed in the same spot and as I was coming to tell him he had cracked the window, he landed the final snowball that BROKE the window! It looks like I'll be getting my french doors sooner than we had planned....

I was able to finish reading my latest Nook book, Last Night at Chateau Marmont by Lauren Weisberger (same author who wrote, "the Devil Wears Prada"; it was such a fun read!

We ended the day by watching the BCS Game, Auburn v Oregon and enjoyed a nice meal of Mexican takeout. If it had been a ducks win, the day would have been stellar!

Fun ways to snag deals!

Everyone needs a fun way to get deals and I have 3!

These websites are the most incredible thing that I ever stumbled upon and as a mom, I am slightly bummed that another mom is who told me about it and I didn't find it on my own!

BabySteals is great because at 9am and again at 9pm they post one new something that is awesome for babies! It's a great way to find out about the new things that are available for babies and most of the deals are 50% off of the retail price or more!

Kidsteals is another great from the "steals" family. They mostly post things for little kids, not really for "big kids", but they're good finds nonetheless. Love it!

ScrapbookSteals is AMAZING! Now, for those of you who don't scrapbook, these find are also great for making cards, craft projects, etc. But for those of you who do, you know how costly scrapbooking can become. This is the place to find everything one day at a time and find things you never even knew about! How fun is that?!?

Be ware, you are limited on the quantity of what you are allowed to purchase and for some of the really awesome things, you are racing against the clock to get what you want! They had BabyLegs a while back and, no joke, they were sold out in less than an hour!

Happy Stealing! :)