10.13.2015

The green eyed gal

I have I spent a decent amount of time today working in this blog post. Thinking about what message for parenting and/or teaching I wanted to share today. Because it's my fall break, that also meant I spent to much time on Facebook. I saw lots of beach and vacation pictures and sadly, I felt my eyes turn a little green. 

Then this afternoon, after taking Annie to go use her gift cards and buy things she didn't need, we had the following conversation. 
Her: I'm so tired of seeing vacation pictures. 
Me: well, if it makes you feel any better, I think most of the people I see are shivering. 
Her: (laughing) true 

Later...

Her: my friends went to the beach together and didn't invite me. 
Me: what would you have said if they did?
Her: I probably couldn't have gone, but I wouldn't be jealous because at least they would have asked. 

Several other omens occurred today that made me jealous of friends for the following reasons:
1. Perceived better credit, income, money management, savings, etc
2. Less kids 
3. More (perceived) free time
4. Personal recognition/achievements at work 
5. Reaching/pursuing personal goals
6. Hanging with mom/siblings
7. Bigger/better houses


None of these speak anything to whether or not I have a great life, kids, family, etc I have a great life, wonderful kids and an awesome family. 

But to be real and fair, this is part of being human. We think whatever is on the other side of the grass, is better than what is right in front of us. And there may be parts of that life that we might like for a minute or two, but ultimately, we would go back to our own lives. 

I feel terrible for new moms. They have it the worst in all of this, I think. We've got seasoned moms sharing what worked for them as thought get thje it is holy truth. Their own mother and/or mother-in-law, or more, sharing what worked for them as though it is holy truth. Then there's the physicians and sadly, Pinterest and the Internet. There's no way to navigate that and not come out feeling like you're doomed before you even start. 

Is there a way to never get jealous? Maybe not. But I think if we can find a way to encourage each other, choose our goals carefully and work towards them; we might start to feel better about all of it. And if you're a new mom or dad and you're reading this, please know whatever it is you do to care for your child, it's exactly right. Do what works best for you and your family and you should come out just fine. 

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