Loved from afar....reflections after loss and Orlando

My mother died on December 24, 2011. At the time I was 30, I had been married for 10 years and had 3 children with one on the way. I had started a good career as a teacher, at a school I really really liked, my husband was finally going to graduate college and was a stay-at-home dad with plans to get a pretty good job or stay home in the fall. Life was ok.

Losing my mother put my husband and I in a tailspin. She was an integral part of our family. Picking up my children from school, having weekly dinners with us and generally just being a great grandmother to her grand children. But more than that, she was my friend. She was my husband's friend. We had no way (or desire) to replace her. But, there was such a huge void. It was more than the cliched "hole in your heart"....it was a crater in my life!

Over the last 4.5 years we have attempted to make small changes and edits to our lives to allow the pain of that crater to be some what diminished from the pain it was originally. But it has taken some serious work and a lot of time.

This summer, I am teaching summer school at my mother's last school assignment as an Art Teacher before she died. There are several pieces of art around the building and they are all captivating, which was her style. But, she also left a more everlasting piece of herself. Her love for gardening. She started and created a beautiful courtyard, complete with a seedling of her grandmother's rose bush. I have been asked to help maintain those flowers, and oh what a gift it is. It is a quiet gift of her love to get to care for her roses.

Earlier this week there was a shooting in Orlando. If you had not already heard, it was pretty awful. My heart hurts for those who have lost loved ones. For those who feel threatened. For those who have felt this pain. Then more recently this week, a child was ripped from his parents at a beach in Orlando at a Disney Resort Hotel.

There is no simple way to solve the many problems that are affecting our society right now. For what ever reason, some people have real fundamental problems with other people for religious, social, cultural or other reasons. I do not pretend that I understand what is going on.

All I can say to those who have lost loved ones or are affected by the many tragedies; you are loved.

I hope over time you are able to find love and support in these times and are able to find peace.

Look for the moments when your loved ones will speak to you. Because they will. It will be subtle and quiet, but it will be there.

A Recap on the Bat Mitzvah

A little over 2 years ago, I shared all the planning that was going in to getting ready for Annie's Bat Mitzvah. It was such a beautiful day!

So many friends and family came to help us celebrate Annie's great accomplishment.

When we first started out on this journey, we really didn't know Megan, the girl with whom Annie shared her Bat Mitzvah, and her family. Now, I can't imagine my life without them.

Here's some of the things we did:

For the service we wrote our own program. It had some information about the girls and specifics to their service, a lot of information about our synagogue and some great ideas about things our visitors could do while they were in Memphis. If you would like a copy for your Bar or Bat Mitzvah, email me!

We also made busy bags and coloring programs for the service. This was a HUGE part of having a really great day! The kids who came to the service all had a way to engage with the songs that are a regular part of the service, but the coloring pages were pictures of what was happening in the same order that things were actually going on!

For the luncheon following the service, we invited family to Central BBQ. We had posters of each girl for family to sign and paper and crayons on the tables to keep the kiddos occupied. Flowers acted as center-pieces for a few of the tables and the whole experience was warm and special.

For the party, we headed to the pool! A inflatable projector screen made it possible to share pictures of the girls and we grilled burgers and hot dogs! We had custom cups printed as a party favor, and really got to enjoy a big birthday celebration!

If you are interested in the weekly to-do lists for the last couple of months of planning, I am working on a DIY workbook! If you are interested in being one of the first to know about it, please let me know, by emailing me here.

Here's a few pictures of the great day!

It was a great day, beautifully photographed by our dear friend, Hiedi Walter. If you would like to have her photograph your family, please email her here.

Exersaucer Time!

Now that Dilly has gotten bigger, it was time to bring out the exersaucer so that she could start working on strengthening her legs. She did great her first time in the exersaucer and seemed to have a lot of fun.

What we didn't expect was what kept happening during the day on Sunday...Lissy kept climbing into the exersaucer! As you can see from the pictures below, she was constantly putting her baby into the exersaucer and climbing on top and standing before climbing into the seat and playing with all the toys.

As you can see in the picture, she put crayons in the bottom of the exersaucer earlier while playing.

                                    So proud of herself that she got in and was able to play!

 It was hilarious to watch her play and then get frustrated when she couldn't get herself out!!!

The ongoing Kitchen project...

Kitchens are a difficult thing to handle. Especially, when trying to make them feel like home and comforting and all of those other good words.

You all know what happens during a party right? Everyone ends up in the kitchen.

Well, my kitchen was dark. And dense. and cramped. Even if you wanted to be in the kitchen, it was too tight and too small for that to happen.

When we bought our house in 2006, this is what our kitchen was like. It had wood cabinets, laminate floors, awful counter tops, brown electric stove and a dishwasher and fridge that were both black.

To try and make the kitchen feel a little brighter, I painted the cabinet facing white, the doors orange, and the soffets yellow. The hardware was black Sadly enough, this matched the floor perfectly.

Now, we have taken down half a wall and built a half wall, replaced the linoleum floor with tile, repainted the walls and taken down the cabinets to have open shelving. On the backside of the kitchen wall, we have a built in buffet, with a cookbook nook under it. The buffet shown has pictures under plexiglass, allowing us to personalize and change our buffet look to match the season.Here's a shot of the cookbook nook before it got painted.

 

As the kitchen continues to change, I will be sure to share pictures how it looks. This is one of the hard parts about being a homeowner...there's so much you want to do and only so much you can afford.