Loved from afar....reflections after loss and Orlando

My mother died on December 24, 2011. At the time I was 30, I had been married for 10 years and had 3 children with one on the way. I had started a good career as a teacher, at a school I really really liked, my husband was finally going to graduate college and was a stay-at-home dad with plans to get a pretty good job or stay home in the fall. Life was ok.

Losing my mother put my husband and I in a tailspin. She was an integral part of our family. Picking up my children from school, having weekly dinners with us and generally just being a great grandmother to her grand children. But more than that, she was my friend. She was my husband's friend. We had no way (or desire) to replace her. But, there was such a huge void. It was more than the cliched "hole in your heart"....it was a crater in my life!

Over the last 4.5 years we have attempted to make small changes and edits to our lives to allow the pain of that crater to be some what diminished from the pain it was originally. But it has taken some serious work and a lot of time.

This summer, I am teaching summer school at my mother's last school assignment as an Art Teacher before she died. There are several pieces of art around the building and they are all captivating, which was her style. But, she also left a more everlasting piece of herself. Her love for gardening. She started and created a beautiful courtyard, complete with a seedling of her grandmother's rose bush. I have been asked to help maintain those flowers, and oh what a gift it is. It is a quiet gift of her love to get to care for her roses.

Earlier this week there was a shooting in Orlando. If you had not already heard, it was pretty awful. My heart hurts for those who have lost loved ones. For those who feel threatened. For those who have felt this pain. Then more recently this week, a child was ripped from his parents at a beach in Orlando at a Disney Resort Hotel.

There is no simple way to solve the many problems that are affecting our society right now. For what ever reason, some people have real fundamental problems with other people for religious, social, cultural or other reasons. I do not pretend that I understand what is going on.

All I can say to those who have lost loved ones or are affected by the many tragedies; you are loved.

I hope over time you are able to find love and support in these times and are able to find peace.

Look for the moments when your loved ones will speak to you. Because they will. It will be subtle and quiet, but it will be there.

A Recap on the Bat Mitzvah

A little over 2 years ago, I shared all the planning that was going in to getting ready for Annie's Bat Mitzvah. It was such a beautiful day!

So many friends and family came to help us celebrate Annie's great accomplishment.

When we first started out on this journey, we really didn't know Megan, the girl with whom Annie shared her Bat Mitzvah, and her family. Now, I can't imagine my life without them.

Here's some of the things we did:

For the service we wrote our own program. It had some information about the girls and specifics to their service, a lot of information about our synagogue and some great ideas about things our visitors could do while they were in Memphis. If you would like a copy for your Bar or Bat Mitzvah, email me!

We also made busy bags and coloring programs for the service. This was a HUGE part of having a really great day! The kids who came to the service all had a way to engage with the songs that are a regular part of the service, but the coloring pages were pictures of what was happening in the same order that things were actually going on!

For the luncheon following the service, we invited family to Central BBQ. We had posters of each girl for family to sign and paper and crayons on the tables to keep the kiddos occupied. Flowers acted as center-pieces for a few of the tables and the whole experience was warm and special.

For the party, we headed to the pool! A inflatable projector screen made it possible to share pictures of the girls and we grilled burgers and hot dogs! We had custom cups printed as a party favor, and really got to enjoy a big birthday celebration!

If you are interested in the weekly to-do lists for the last couple of months of planning, I am working on a DIY workbook! If you are interested in being one of the first to know about it, please let me know, by emailing me here.

Here's a few pictures of the great day!

It was a great day, beautifully photographed by our dear friend, Hiedi Walter. If you would like to have her photograph your family, please email her here.

Why I do what I do

If you have a job that you love, cool. But if you have a job that mostly doesn't feel like a job, THEN you have something worth hanging on to.

I am not sure who said those words to me. But, I firmly believe in them.

This afternoon was another great example of this. I met with another parent and talked to one on the phone. Both of them were met with my usual happy upbeat personality, but I think they both were surprised by how very clear I am. So many teachers are so tired of what they do, that I don't think they really understand how vital they are. Some truly do not understand the impact they can have on their student population and the lasting effects of those relationships.

Each year I say that I have 204 kids; 4 I gave birth to and 200 that the school gave me. This year I feel that even more than normal. These kids are really incredible. I hear people say, "they have such a bright light" about different people and I've never really known what that meant. This year I do. These kids are AMAZING. They soak up the material while we're in class. They tell me jokes. They tell me problems. They ask me questions. They are incredible. I force them to work really, really, really, hard and they do it.

For the most part, I don't have any behavior issues. Ever. It is so strange to me. I've never been this lucky before. I give all the credit to the kids. Don't get me wrong, I am working my tushie off! I study every night to make sure I can teach them correctly, do my best to write quizzes and tests that are aligned with the primary learning objectives, write lesson plans that I think are really fun and they they will engage in and then write study guides that I believe will guide them in the right direction. It's the best hard work I've done in a long time.

I think this is the, "I am so blessed" post. Most of the time those sound so trite to me. I hope this doesn't sound that way. But, truly, I have never had a roster full of kids for whom I feel nearly the same way as I feel about my own kids. They're incredible. They make me want to work harder at my classes for my Doctorate to be sure that I am working at setting a good example.

Now, this is where I get pretty out of character for me....If you are of the praying kind, whatever your method, prayer beads, incense, spiritual gods, good vibes, positive energy, what have you; say a prayer for us. We have a big mountain to climb to try and get these kids to reach the proficient goal on the end of course test in May. I want to see these sweet kids reach the top. Help us reach the top.

6 months of cuteness in pictures!

Now that Dilly is 6 months old, I thought I'd share 6 months of cute pictures. Don't worry, it's not a picture per day. She has been such a joy to have as a part of our family. It is so funny, because when I found out I was pregnant, before  I told Geoff, it seemed crazy to me to think of having 4 children. Now that we have 4 children, I couldn't imagine our home without all of them. Our most recent addition, Lillian Daphne, fondly known as Dilly.

She has been such a sweet baby. She smiles, is rather round, which is always cute on a baby and is working hard to be able sit up on her own and we can all tell that any minute now she will be moving around! Life will certainly be crazy then!

When she was born she weighed in at 6 pounds, 12 ounces and was 21 inches long. This is the whole gang all together on the outside for the first time. Dilly was about 5 minutes old.

We had Lissy's 1 year and Dilly's newborn pictures taken by my friend, Laurie. She owns Southern Style Photography.  

Below is Dilly on her 2 month birthday.

 
at 2 months old she weighed 10 pounds and 8 ounces and was 24 inches long.

by 6 months she weighed 16 pounds 13 ounces and was 27 inches long.

She now coos and smiles and everyone, nearly sleeps through the nite and will laugh and hold hands with LissyJane while Lissy Jane dances in front of her.

I cant' wait to see how she changes over the next 6 months. I know having 2 little ones is going to be crazy, especially with 2 big kids at the same time, but none the less; I am excited for what the future holds for our family.

 

Zbo and JoJo

So I took Jonas to meet Zach Randolph from the Memphis Grizzlies. We waited in line for just about 2 full hours. He made several new friends while we waited and then when we got up to meet Zbo, he had the biggest grin on his face! He asked Zach about the game coming up on Wednesday versus Dirk and pointed out that no one else can go up against Dirk but Zach. I think Zach liked that. I have no doubt this will be one of those things he remembers for years to come!